The toughest position in youth sports? Being the parent.
For many parents, watching their child compete in youth sports is both a source of immense pride and a daunting challenge. Parents of athletes ages 12–21 face a unique balancing act: supporting their child’s dreams while navigating academic pressures, financial costs, social expectations, and the intensity of competitive play. At times, it can feel like one wrong move or one strained conversation with a coach could disrupt not only athletic progress but also the child’s well-being.
Parenting athletes isn’t only about showing up for your athlete’s games and paying for equipment—it’s also about setting a true example of leadership. The way parents lead in this space has the power to shape their athlete’s development both on and away from the sidelines.
Hanna Howard, CEO of Rematch and a former collegiate basketball coach, has spent her career guiding athletes and families through the youth sports journey. Her leadership lessons offer a road map for parents seeking to build successful athletes and thriving young people and communities.
This article explores Hanna’s key leadership principles and provides practical strategies for creating a supportive, positive environment for young athletes.
Why a Positive Youth Sports Culture Is Nonnegotiable for Athlete Development
A positive youth sports culture is more than just good sportsmanship. It’s an environment where young athletes feel safe to take risks, learn from their mistakes, and develop resilience. In this culture, athletes are motivated to improve their skills, stay engaged in their sport, and carry lessons of discipline, teamwork, and integrity into other areas of life.
When the environment turns negative, the consequences can be severe. Teenage athlete burnout, declining youth sports mental health, and early dropouts are all linked to toxic or pressure-filled sports cultures. In contrast, when parents and coaches intentionally create a positive culture, athletes are more likely to thrive mentally, emotionally, and physically.
Parents play a pivotal role here. Guided by strong leadership principles, they become the architects of this culture, shaping not only their child’s individual experience but also the broader youth sports community.
Listen to Hanna’s full conversation on positive youth sports culture here: The Youth Sports Parenting Tribe.
Hanna Howard’s 4 Core Leadership Principles for Sports Parents
Hanna offers four principles that create a road map for parents of young athletes.
Principle 1: Lead with empathy to understand the modern teenage athlete.
Today’s teenage athletes are under unique pressures. Beyond the demands of competition, they face academic stress and social media scrutiny, and they’re often pressed to choose early specialization in one sport. These pressures can make youth sports both rewarding and overwhelming.
Hanna emphasizes empathy as the foundation of effective sports parenting. Supporting young athletes means listening more than directing and working to understand their motivations. Parents can begin by asking themselves: Why does my child play this sport? What do they love about it? Validating their answers strengthens trust and resilience.
Practical tips for leading your athlete with empathy:
- Schedule check-ins outside of sports conversations.
- Listen carefully after a tough game instead of immediately offering advice.
- Affirm that their identity extends beyond athletic performance.
This empathetic leadership not only reduces stress but also helps athletes feel valued as whole people.
Principle 2: Champion a growth mindset over a “win-at-all-costs” mentality.
A fixed mindset focuses on outcomes: winning the game, scoring points, earning the scholarship. A growth mindset emphasizes the process: effort, adaptability, and learning from mistakes. Hanna stresses that when parents champion a growth mindset, athletes develop resilience and motivation that extend far beyond sports.
Instead of praising only results, parents can highlight strategies and effort:
- “I loved watching how you adjusted your defense in the second half.”
- “You worked so hard to support your teammates today.”
By modeling and reinforcing a growth mindset, parents help athletes build confidence in their ability to learn and grow—even when outcomes aren’t ideal. This approach reduces the risk of burnout and fosters long-term athlete development.
Principle 3: Cultivate the parent-coach relationship through proactive communication.
One of the most challenging dynamics in youth sports is the parent-coach relationship. Misunderstandings or adversarial approaches can create unnecessary tension, undermining both the athlete’s experience and the team culture. Hanna frames this relationship as a partnership: Parents and coaches should work together toward the shared goal of athlete development
Key best practices for youth sports communication include:
- Respect the 24-hour rule before addressing concerns about a game with your athlete’s coach.
- Approach conversations privately and respectfully, not in front of other athletes or parents.
- Ask thoughtful questions about the coach’s philosophy instead of making assumptions.
- Encourage your child to speak directly with the coach, respect boundaries, and focus on solutions.
- Don’t criticize the coach publicly, demand playing time, or create divisions within the team.
When handled with leadership and maturity, the parent-coach relationship strengthens the athlete’s experience and models professionalism for the young athlete.
Principle 4: Model sportsmanship and integrity from the sidelines.
Children learn as much from what parents do as from what they say. Sideline behavior is a powerful teaching tool in youth sports. Hanna emphasizes that modeling sportsmanship teaches values of respect, fairness, and humility that will carry through an athlete’s life.
Parents can demonstrate leadership in a few ways:
- Respect officials, even when calls don’t go their way.
- Cheer for the entire team, not just their child.
- Avoid negative comments about players, coaches, or opponents.
- Use the post-game car ride to celebrate effort and growth rather than to criticize performance.
These small actions build a standard of integrity and create a supportive environment that motivates athletes to lead with the same values.
Beyond Your Athlete: How to Build a Thriving Youth Sports Community
While it’s natural for parents to focus primarily on their own child’s development, Hanna reminds us that building a thriving youth sports community benefits everyone. Strong communities foster positive youth sports culture and provide support for athletes, coaches, and parents alike.
Parents can take initiative when they:
- Organize team-building activities outside of practices.
- Create supportive parent group chats that emphasize encouragement, not criticism.
- Celebrate collective achievements, not just individual successes.
- Welcome new families to the team.
- Support the coach’s efforts to create team cohesion.
This collective leadership ensures that the culture around the sport is one of unity and support. Over time, these practices contribute to athlete development, mental well-being, and community strength.
Leading with Purpose Through Youth Sports Parenting
The journey of parenting a young athlete is complex, challenging, and deeply rewarding. Hanna’s leadership lessons highlight how empathy, a growth mindset, proactive communication, and modeled sportsmanship can transform not just individual athletes but also entire communities. By embracing these principles, parents move beyond the role of cheerleader or chauffeur and into the role of leader, mentor, and culture-builder.
Rematch shares in this vision. By capturing highlights, celebrating achievements, and connecting parents to their athlete’s journey, Rematch empowers families to stay engaged in ways that are positive and lasting. Together, tools such as Rematch and leadership lessons from experts such as Hanna create an ecosystem where youth sports parenting thrives.
Ready to put these lessons into action? Download the Rematch app and subscribe to The Rundown for more insights, stories, and resources that support parents and athletes alike.
